Social Media Etiquette

Social media interaction is in many ways a part of everyone's daily lives. And since it is a communication medium with every single person in your life, it is important that each one of us understand the proper ways to behave online.

Would you do the following in a face-to-face interaction?

* Acting all close and spilling your secrets to someone you barely know?
* Be self-absorbed and consistently talk about yourself w/o regard to everyone else around you?
* Randomly approach a friend and ask for favors -- repeatedly?
* Constantly announce to the world what you are doing (even the littlest things: I am walking, I am eating..etc)

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you may want to visit a refresher course on social media etiquette specifically Facebook and Twitter. Just because you are behind a monitor in your room doesn't mean that you can do and say as you please -- no holds barred.

Facebook
1. Randomly add people just because you have more than 2 mutual friends.

Many users like to keep their Facebook to their circle of friends and family or at least to people they have acquainted to in the past. If you are looking to make friends, properly introduce yourself when adding them. Don't always assume they know you -- especially when they, well, don't.

2. Tagging individuals in items that you sell.

I am severely annoyed by this ever since online sellers started invading Facebook. I like online shopping A LOT but I really hate it when people tag me on pictures that are totally unrelated to me. If you are selling something, send a message with the link to your album rather than annoy your friends and flood their walls with weight loss products.

3. Publicizing private conversation on a wall post.

There is such a thing as too much information. Even though you know everyone on your Facebook, have a little sense of privacy and use the messages feature to discuss private matters.

4. Harassing people to "like" your post.

Facebook contests are used as a marketing strategy of some businesses to make their product known. In effect, "contestants" request their friends to "like" their entry for them to win the contest. This is really fine with me, but harassing your friends and constantly sending them messages for you to win is just plain rude. One simple request is enough, but please..for crying out loud, huwag pilitin ang ayaw!

5. Abusing application invites.

Some people are just not that into games. Personally this is really fine with me bec I do enjoy some Facebook games, but I have encountered some people who really force you to click the application invite just to increase their "neighbors." Again, stop harassing people for your own advantage.

6. Spamming.

Facebook spam and scams are consistently increasing mainly because some are too naive to understand that not all that they see on their friends' feeds are true. For the last time, there is no application that will allow you to know who viewed your profile, you will not win an iPad by clicking the damn smiley pic, and you will never see Justin Bieber nude. Get over it!

Twitter
1. Mundane tweeting.

Tweets such as "I'm sleepy!" "Eating breakfast.." "About to sleep, good night!" may be interesting to some, but 90% of your followers could care less about the fact that you are eating or that you want to sleep. As much as possible, kill non-sense tweeting and tweet with purpose. Maybe you would want to revise your tweets with: "Breakfast at Banapple. This Banoffee pie is amazing. A must-try!" Always consider what's in it for your followers -- give them a chance to react to your posts. After all, there's really nothing much to reply to "I'm sleepy," right? :)

2. Using Twitter feed as chatroom.

I used to do this actually, but ever since some famous people started following me, I am now conscious with what I tweet and I tell my friends to just BBM me. Generally, conversations that are exclusive in nature should be kept private using chat platforms. Twitter is a broadcast medium, and although it empowers you to use the @ symbol to directly talk to individuals, it doesn't mean that you and your friend can flood your mutual followers' Twitter feeds. Using @mentions to talk to someone is absolutely fine, but everything should be kept in moderation.

3. Constantly asking your followers to follow your friend.

"Guys, follow my friend @Twitternewbie! Thank you! Pls RT" -- I mean seriously, why should we? Unless your friend is someone famous or is tweeting VERY interesting stuff, then please save yourself some time and effort because no one will follow your friend back. Revise your tweets with: "To my UP Diliman MMA classmates, follow Prof @Twitternewbie!" or "My friend @Twitternewbie tweets the funniest stuff about cheesy pick-up lines, follow him he's hilarious!"

4. Avoid Internet drama.

Broadcasting your how stupid your boss is, how your ex cheated on you, or how your colleague is having an affair with someone from work is a risky risky business. Not only will it make you look pathetic, it will also make you look unprofessional.

5. Tweet nothing but RANTS.

Expressing disappointment or frustration over something is fine every once in a while. But as I have said, everything should be kept in moderation. I recently unfollowed someone because I got really annoyed of her constant negative tweeting. Who would want to constantly read stuff like "F*ck you! You ruined my day!" "You really think you are pretty?! Ew!" "Lecheng buhay to!" "I am a bitch and I have a right to because I am hot." Irritating right?? And seriously, BEING A BITCH IS NOTHING TO BE PROUD OF.

Personally for me , it all boils down to three basic rules:
1. Respect the community.
2. Listen to others.
3. Be accountable for your actions.

Always remember that social media communities are real relationships with real conversations among real people. As such, social media interaction should be treated with respect as your personality reflects on it. Is it really that much to ask for people to be a NICE person, whether face-to-face or virtually?

Taking Personal Drama to the Internet

What is Internet Drama?

Internet drama, in my personal definition, refers to the irrational broadcasting of personal issues on the Interweb. Since the Internet has completely changed our modern life, our dependency with the web has impacted our ways to deal with personal issues. It doesn't matter if it's work, family or relationship problems -- as soon private grievances start to go public via Facebook or Twitter, things can automatically turn ugly in a snap.

Case in point: During a recent breakup, a distraught ex can do or say things on their Facebook walls that they'd never do face-to-face. They use harsh words, throw accusations out of misery, try to illicit jealousy, or seek revenge in a multitude of other ways. Mutual friends are abruptly excommunicated, and pictures are suddenly untagged from each other's albums. You might immediately change your relationship status to single and wait till your wall is bombarded with questions about the breakup -- aggravating the virtual salt that continue to rub into very real wounds.



While some people just can't help it, I think it's safe to say that most of us wants to avoid Internet drama and not stoop to online lows. If you are one of us, here are a few tips that may help whenever you're in the brink of announcing to the world that your ex is a pathetic psychopath:

1. Use the reverse psychology. If your ex just can't help it but publicize every little thing you guys went through, remember that there's no better comeback than a silent treatment. Let him talk, while you maintain your silence and continue to tweet positive things. Soon, your mutual friends will realize who is the biggest loser.

2. Take advantage of Facebook's security settings. It is there for a reason. Sick of someone who constantly complain about her misery? Hide their feeds so you won't see them anymore. Fighting with someone? Hide your wall or just completely block him/her. Do whatever it takes until you get that peace of mind you surely deserve.

3. Stop online stalking. This normally happens after a breakup, you track your ex's whereabouts, newly added friends, constant Twitter buddy, etc. You have to understand that stalking is a compulsive, unsatisfying behavior and will only leave you feeling emptier especially if your ex has clearly moved on before you. Instead of stalking, why not use your energy to reconnect with friends or find new hobbies and interests?

4. Resist publicizing EVERYTHING! Your closest friends already know who you're dating, your family is already aware of your financial issues, and your colleagues are very much aware how much your work sucks -- therefore, there's no need to trumpet them every chance you get. Just because you can share everything on Facebook and Twitter doesn't mean you should.

5. Have common sense. Facebook is a social networking tool, not an online diary. Therefore, being an open book to everyone and announcing to the world how much your ex-boyfriend hurt you is not gonna benefit anyone. Simple, vague comments are okay, but don't let the technology shadow your emotional intelligence. Online battles are for 3rd graders, and if your ex won't stop posting negative comments about you, simply unfriend him and pray that his sanity be restored soon.

Sharing too much information on the Internet can be messy and humiliating. No matter how bad the situation is, or no matter how much you want the other person to be humiliated, always remember that this public drama reflects poorly on you. Avoiding many of the soap operas that flare up on Facebook or Twitter does not only give you peace of mind, but will also project a sense of self-confidence and maturity that most Internet users lack.

Scams, Spam & Other Annoyances on Facebook

With over 600 million users, Facebook is undoubtedly the most viewed website worldwide. Because of this, it's no surprise that it has constantly been under heavy attack on spams and scams. I can't remember how many times I complained about some people who flood my walls and message box convincing me to "Click on this link to (insert an impossible idea here)."

What is a spam? Basically, a spam is the act of flooding the Internet with many copies of the same message, in an attempt to force the message on people who would not otherwise choose to receive that message. To apply in Facebook, a spam is an application that is designed specifically for spreading a message -- using events in the news to grab your attention and spread malicious links. In short, they exist to ANNOY people.

I personally feel that there are two main reasons for the spread of Facebook spams:
1. Users trust almost anything that they see on their news feeds.
2. Facebook's security measures are not tight.

Here are the most common Facebook spams & scams I have encountered so far:

"Click to See Who Viewed Your Profile." - I don't get why some people still get fooled by this. FYI: There are no applications out there that exist solely to alter the settings of Facebook. If you want the capability to know who views your profile, switch back to Friendster.





"Free Facebook Credits!" -Shortened URL's especially those offering freebies are 95% SCAM. If it sounds too good to be true, then it probably is.


"Mafia Wars Freebies" - I used to play this game and I know you can get freebies by asking your friends to send you some. Again, do not fall the bait on freebies using shortened URL's -- unless you want a malware.


"Free iPad!" - Omg, I am super annoyed at this one because I have been bombarded by these links on my wall prompting me to restrict my wall to some people. I know we all love winning gadgets especially as good as an iPad, but come on guys -- the way the "promo" was presented is so informal and so dubious.


"See A Picture of Bin Laden Dead." - This is the latest spam going around and it quickly spread all over Facebooklandia mainly because this is a current event and the curiosity in us wants to see Bin Laden's pic. After it was reported how gruesome it looks, most people (myself included) of course wants to see it too! But don't you think that if there is a real picture out there, it will be posted as an actual pic and not as a malicious link?


While my pal Mark Zuckerberg (wag makelam, lol) is doing the best he could in keeping our favorite social networking site secure, I think it is also our responsibility to our Facebook friends to be extra careful on what we're posting as we are in a one big online community. Here are a few things to keep in mind about these spam/scam attacks:

1. Be aware of the applications that you authorize to post on your wall. Wait, you know where to find that right? :)
2. Do not trust shortened URL's. If the link is really worth checking out, best to ask the person who sent you that link first to verify if it's really a trusted site.
3. Lastly, if it came from a person who don't normally post links on your wall, and the message is sort of generic -- Eh alam na! Okay?

A good rule of thumb when using apps is to investigate the settings. If an app seems to require an inordinate amount of access to your profile and the brand or app maker isn’t well known, then the best practice is simply to avoid using the app.

I hope a good number of my Facebook friends get to read this, because all the examples I posted above are actual wall posts I found on my friends' profiles. I hope I didn't offend anybody, but if I do -- I'm sorry, this blog is intended to educate and not to bash people. :)

Happy Facebooking!